There is a positive side to being 40 and over ?

1. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.

2. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.

3. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.

4. People call at 9 PM and ask, "Did I wake you?"

5. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.

6. Things you buy now won't wear out.

7. You can eat dinner at 4 P.M.

9. You enjoy hearing about other peoples operations.

10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.

11. You have a party and the neighbors don't even realize it.

12. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.

13. You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room.

14. You sing along with elevator music.

15. Your eyes won't get much worse.

16. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.

17. You can't remember who sent you this list to read.

18. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.

19. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.

20. No one expects you to run into a burning building.

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